❝In which a celebrity dials a random number in hope of finding one last thing to make him smile before he commits suicide at the end of the month.❞ "I'm going to commit suicide in one months time." "I think you have the wrong number." "It can't be the wrong number Princess. I picked a random number from the catalog." "Why on earth would you do that?" "Because you, sweetheart, are now my own personal suicide helpline. Your job is to make the last month of my life worth living." ______________________

"Its an emergency." "Is your hair stuck in your onsie again?" "...yes." [Dialogue story]

"Princess, is that you?" "I'm sorry, what? You have the wrong number." "It cannot be a wrong number if I dialed a random number." "Does this work on all the ladies?" "More importantly, is it working on you?" "To be determined." [Completed]

[Highest Ranks: #1 in hotline, and #11 in Short story] "Do you really want to know my name" " Yes tell me" " DO YOU REALLY REALLY WANT TO KNOW?" "YESS" " YOU REALLY REALLY REALLY WANT TO KNOW!" " YESS TELL ME GODDAMMIT!" " MY NAME IS..." " WHAT?" " THE NAMES BOND, JAMES BOND" --- Sitting around in an office chair working part time wasn't really Lucys cup of tea and being home alone wasn't really the same either for Mark when you have an idiot for a roommate, but who knew things would get a little livelier when you mix: One fateful phone call Two amazingly sarcastic dorks And a whole lot of puns. You might just want to buckle up your seatbelts for the sarcastic duo coming your way.

One note, two note, three note and more notes from anonymous. *A/N: This story is pretty cheesy! Be warned lol * Amazing cover by @mara_cleia

"who are you?" "it doesn't matter." "uh, it kinda does." "all you need to know is I'm a guy that's your age and goes to your school." "thanks, that narrows it down to about two hundred people."

In which a boy attempts to parent a mess-of-a-caller. But parenting just doesn't work that way. ████████████████ Written in dialogue form. Also written when I was like 15 so please don't come for me :') Not a sequel to "Teenage Helpline". © @MiaNightlock. Cover made by me.

"This is Julio's pizzeria, what would you like to order?" "Hi, could I have a large pepperoni pizza with a double chocolate mocha delivered to 76 Maple Avenue?" "That will be 13.50. Anything else?" "Not really." "Your order will be ready in 20 minutes. Thank you for calling." "No problemo, love ya." "Love you too." "..." "..." "Did you just --" "Don't expect any discount on your pizza just because I expressed my undying love for you." // idea from tumblr \\ //and yes This is cliche\\

"hello, sweet treats bakery at your service. how may i help yo-" "did you know that the first macaron was made in italy?" "uh, no?" "do you have macarons?" "yes, ma'am." "great! i'll order about, 4 dozen. thanks, see you soon." {lower case intended} {highest rank: #159 in short story} © SUNRAYYS

"Hey Blondie! What the hell are you doing?" I hear a voice behind me. I spare a glance to the person, and then balance myself on the ladder. "Can't you see, I am covering this class in toilet paper? I soo don't want to take the chemistry test." I continue my work. I am sure if Mr Thomas caught me, I would be Dead. "Are you Crazy?" "You will thank me later." ----------------------- Tempestuous: characterized by strong and turbulent or conflicting emotion. Vivian Jackson is pretty much a normal girl, if you ignore the trouble she makes. From blasting color bombs in the corridor to spray painting donuts on the principals door, you name it, she has done it. Sebastian Willson has spent one third of his life in detention, the other third of it in bunking classes and the last in the basket ball court. So when he sees Vivian wrecking his chemistry classroom, he is surprised. Because for the first time has he seen a girl being so bold and blunt. When these two meet sparks fly along with some knifes, toilet paper, water guns and cupcakes. Will these two be too opposite to attract, or a match made in hell? Come and join to see what happens in when a strong willed guy and a Tempestuous girl come together. Cover by the beautiful just_yasmin WARNING: CONTAINS EATING DISORDERS, ABUSE, AND HARASSMENT. IF YOU FEEL TRIGGERED BY ANY OF THESE, PLEASE READ ON UR OWN RISK #31 in Humor #43 in Teen Fiction